10 Ways to Build Self-esteem and Self-confidence in your Children

by Steve & Lisa McChesney

You are taking an important step in influencing and
forming all of our futures. The following are ten ways
that you can explain how the self-esteem muscle is built.
It's important that you understand what self-esteem means
and how, like any other muscle, it needs to be exercised
in order to grow. Self-esteem is defined as having respect
for oneself, or more simply put, liking yourself. Ask your
kids if they would like to have someone just like themselves
as a friend. If the answer is yes, then they obviously like
themselves. You now just need to build on that foundation.
If the answer is no, then you have got your work cut out for

The 10 ways to build the self-esteem muscle.
1. Always tell the truth.
Ask your kids if they feel good about themselves when they
don't tell the truth. It's hard to feel good about yourself
when you are worried that someone is going to find out that
you didn't tell the truth. It causes stress. On the other
hand, if they tell the truth, they can feel good about
themselves for being honest. The fact that they know that
you are proud of them for being honest makes them feel good
about themselves as well.
2. Take responsibility.
Tell your kids that if they did something they shouldn't
have, admit it! Don't blame it on others or make excuses.
Let them know that when they can take responsibility for
their actions, they can take pride in themselves for
behaving like a responsible person.
3. Be able to take a compliment.
If someone gives you a compliment, smile and say,
"Thank you". The fact that someone compliments you should
make you feel good about yourself. To say thank you to the
person giving the compliment makes them feel good about
themselves. This is a win-win situation.
4. Complete assignments early.
If your kids have a homework assignment, it's best to finish
it early. Once it's done, they can feel good about
themselves for fulfilling their responsibilities. If they
put it off, it becomes stressful when it competes with other
family activities of the evening such as dinner, baths, etc.
Worse yet, it gets put off until the next morning and the
stress level rises even further.
5. Avoid negative people.
Tell your children to pick friends who have high self-
esteem, and who feel good about themselves. There is a lot
of truth in the pressure of peer influence, and to the old
saying 'Birds of a feather flock together'. Keep a keen eye
on the types of friends your children play with.
6. Help raise the self-esteem of others.
One of the best ways to raise your own self-esteem is to
raise the self-esteem of others. Let others know that you
like the way their new haircut looks, or the way they always
have a smile on their face. Congratulate them on their
accomplishments. When we compliment someone and they smile,
it causes us to smile as well.
7. Dream big dreams about the future.
Let your children know that it is okay to dream BIG about
their future. They can be an astronaut and be the first
to walk on Mars. They can be the President of the United
States, or leader of their country and bring peace to the
entire world. When we dream about ourselves and our future,
we feel good about ourselves.
8. Parents are more important than friends.
Kids need to remember that their parents are more important
then their friends. The underlying factor in this is that
parents love their kids unconditionally.
9. Be Healthy.
Exercise regularly. Eat only those foods that are good for
you. I know this is easier said than done when it comes to
kids, however there are many creative ways to get your kids
to eat healthy. The planet is made up mostly of water. The
human body is made up mostly of water. How much of your
child's diet is made up of water?
10. Pick activities that are important.
Have your kids pick activities that are important to them.
Prioritize them and then master them one at a time. Each
time a child masters something they have incredible pride
in themselves.
Self-esteem and self-confidence are two of life's ongoing
requirements. They must be nourished and exercised to make
them strong enough to have lasting effects.
Steve and Lisa McChesney produce a daily tip newsletter
We wish you and your family health and happiness.